fools rush in

when you're engaged in something that is,
uhm, 'on the far end of the honorable spectrum,'

something that's been going on for yearS,

for which so many have personal knowledge of,

for which so many messages have been sent,

the last thing you need
is to go anywhere near
anything that would require you
to make statements under oath.

the results could be ugly,
not just for you
but for your 'business partners.'

i wonder whether your 'clients' would *pay* you a visit.

yes, pun...  🤣

cave in

in the search for truth,
for anything actually,
you keep an open mind.

faced with new information,
you set aside conflicting notions.

you weigh things.

there are sensible statements
and there is nonsense.

there are credible witnesses
and there are those with a history of dishonesty.

there are certainties.
there are inferences.
there are reasonable assumptions.
there are implausible claims.
there are  falsehoods.
there are unknowns.

holding on to certain views
when the body of evidence
shows otherwise
is foolish.

you're positioning yourself on shaky ground.
you're setting yourself up for a web of lies
you'd be hard put to keep track of.

you might think you're saving face
but you're actually just losing credibility.

justifying a fault doubles it.
don't make matters worse than they already are.

request for comments

in this age of customizable privacy settings,
you can choose what to show to
and what to hide from
certain people.

you don't filter your audience,
you're opening yourself up to comments from everyone.

in this big, wide world,
people have different experiences.

maybe your friends
have experienced only good times with you.

your neighbor, on the other hand,
may have yearS-long experience
of your dogS camping out at their place,
complete with pee and poop.

you can't expect these people
to react the same way
when you post about dogs.

now are you supposed to complain
about certain comments being unsolicited?

uhm, you put the post out there for people to see.

how does this go?

do you really go around soliciting comments for your posts?

"hey, say something nice about my post."

nyahaha...  RFC of a different kind...

desperate 🤣


some people complain about a reaction
without at all mentioning what triggered it.

you're supposed to
"tell the truth,
the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth."

if you do so,
you just might realize
that the complainant should actually be
the other party.


you don't fault a child for the sins of the parent.
you can, however, fault the parent for the sins of the child.

not just once,
not just twice,
not just thrice,
not just four times,
not just five times,
countless times,
children from the neighbors' place
have entered our properties,
playing dangerously
not just in my parents' yard
but also in my balcony ->  on the third floor!
(there are other things these youngsters have done.
i can talk about them verbally
but i'm not gonna immortalize them in a blog.)

these (two separate) properties have gates.
they open the gates!

i used to walk over to the guardian's own gate
(the grandmother of one of the children)
and tell her through the window
to stop the kids from opening our gates
and entering our premises.

you know what she'd do?

she'd just look at me,
say nothing,
then continue watching TV.

invariably that's what happens.

she never once went out to check the kids.
she never once went out to call them.
she never once sent out anyone to call them.
she'd just stay put on her chair and go on watching TV.

pretty much like the rest of her household
who do not even bother to pick up their dog
and even have the gall to just watch
as it barks on and on and on, unleashed,
in the neighbor's property.

you have to yell at them
to get them to get their pet.
(a regular tone won't do;
there'd be no action.)

what sort of caretakers are these?
they impose
not just their pets
but even persons they should be looking after
on others!

passing on responsibility for your animals
is low enough.
you really have to dig deeper
and pass on your responsibility for a human???
ugh!  rock bottom.


there are no-brainers
and there are those
that require some brain power.

it does not take much to see a dog barking.

it takes a bit more to notice
that the dog is outside its owner's property.

it takes some form of memory
to know that this is already the fourth dog
seven years running
spending time in the neighbor's property.

it takes more brain power
to recognize a pattern in
- your trash being in the neighbor's property
- your stuff being in the neighbor's property
- your pets being in the neighbor's property
- your guests being in the neighbor's property
- your children being in the neighbor's property

you are negligent.
you are irresponsible.
you are inconsiderate.
you are selfish.
you are brazen.
you are shameless.

even skinner's rats were able to recognize patterns.
you've been unable to for years.
are you a creature inferior to a rat???

in four years students graduate from college.
they would have learned a LOT in that span of time.
eight years and your thoughts still haven't progressed much.
(yes, it's just the dogs that's seven;
others were happening longer.)
if this were a school,
you would have been kicked out long ago.

dread not

it's friday.
and today it's not just #FlashbackFriday
but Friday the 13th as well.

you live in the present,
build for the future
and remember the past.

yeah, do not just forget the last.
there are lessons to be learned from the past after all.

some, however, have made a past so horrific,
time could not fade its severity,
they themselves are spooked by it.
they go into panic / defensive mode
the moment it is brought up.

you cannot erase the past.
it's part of who you are.

don't suppress it as if it didn't happen.

don't twist it
to make it appear like something else.
what's done is done.
you cannot change it anymore.

despair not though.
an ugly past does not define you
unless you continue living it.
just do things right henceforth.

friendly ghost

today is thursday, #ThrowbackThursday;
tomorrow, #FlashbackFriday 😊

seven days in a week
and there are two
in which to specially look back to the past.

those who make a good present
also make a past they'd like to to remember.
those who do otherwise
make something they'd rather forget.

"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it."

those who forget the past
will have no idea
what actions they're repeating
and what patterns they're weaving.

some things become apparent only through the lens of time.
you will not know certain things,
for example, as simple as how long something has been going on,
if all you consider is the here and now.
you will not realize certain things
if you cannot think beyond a current event.

you can harp on all you want about the past being past
but if you don't let go of bad behavior
you should not expect others to forget it.

you forget things that are over,
not the ones that haven't stopped.

it's not really past
if you're still living it.

if you continue with the same behavior,
that is not bygone;
it is ongoing.

you don't bury the living,
you bury the dead.

if you want to bury your past,
change your ways.

in so doing,
you can move on to a past
you will not be ashamed to remember.

everything counts

so the neighbor
justifies throwing their trash in our sack
by saying
my (87-year-old) dad
told her
(7-year-old) granddaughter
that they could throw their trash
in our sacks.


i ask my dad
and he says
he never said such a thing
adding he buys those sacks
(in which we put our trash).

i believe him
not because he's my dad
but because his response
is sensible.

there are adults in that house.
why would he choose to relay such a message, if ever,
to a young girl?
and yeah, why would he send such a message at all?

if i were to make sense of things,
what i would be thinking
is that my dad probably saw
the children playing in the alley
and told the granddaughter
to throw their litter
in our trash.

that's it.
end of story.
that would be
what would come to MY mind.

now the tricky part.

i wonder what would come to a young girl's mind.
that my dad is giving them
an open-ended blanket invitation
to throw their trash
in our sacks?
would that be how young girls think?
is that how this young girl thinks?

how would she have announced it to her grandmother, if ever?
seriously?  gleefully?  what?

and if one were the grandmother
hearing something like that
from her granddaughter,
what would come to her mind?
that henceforth they could throw
THEIR household trash
in OUR sacks?

how would she have taken it, if ever?
excitedly?  no skepticism whatsoever?  what?

would she not even feel
that there is something off?
would she not even wonder about the absurdity of the situation?

"i am responsible for what i say.
i am not responsible for what you understand."

who misinterpreted things, if ever?
the grandmother?
the granddaughter?

i'm inclined toward track record
but could not discount the saying,
"the apple does not fall far from the tree."

it would be interesting to know
what actually transpired.

meanwhile, this song is playing in my head:

♩ ♪  the grabbing hands
grab all they can  ♫ ♬


not all comparisons are valid.

you don't expect the same treatment,
you don't elicit the same reaction,
when the circumstances are different.

differences, however, could get lost
on a selfish mind.

let me point them out.

= = = = =

how come i call you out
but not the other neighbor
for parking on the (one-lane) street
(in front of our garage)?

i've discussed this extensively in previous blogs
so i'm keeping it short here:
you have a garage.
they don't.

and please,
that nonsense about not parking there
because your uncle told you not to
because of your mom's condition?

you have been parking on the street
(the whole day, daily, for years)
years before your mom's condition came about.

what sort of logic do you have?

you lie so blatantly.

= = = = =

others leave stuff for distribution with my mom, too,
so why not you.

the differences:

-  the others live far away
and use my parents' house
as a drop-off / halfway point.

you are just next-door.

why is there a need to transfer your stuff
from your house to my parents'?

-  you have a maid
who passes the intended recipients' houses
every schoolday.

why not ask your maid to distribute those stuff for you?

we're not a distribution center.
my mom does it as a favor.

do you really expect my octogenarian mom
to distribute things herself?

no.  she asks me.

= = = = =

you say our trash is out
so why can't yours be, too.

the difference?
our bags are within the unfenced part of our property.
yours are on public space.

= = = = =

you say your trash
is not the only thing scattered in the alley
but leaves from our trees, too.

listen to yourself, LEAVES!

you really think
the leaves from our trees
and your disgusting garbage
are on the same league?!

let me emphasize they are not.

and if you do not see the reason why
then maybe you should find the simplest of persons
to give you an answer within your comprehension.

you used to have a tree, too,
which shed leaves profusely.
i never complained about those leaves
all those years that i was sweeping them.

the other neighbor has trees up to now.
i don't complain about their leaves.

not because we have trees, too.
but because they're, well, leaves.

i complain about human trash.
i complain about your pets' pee and poop.
i complain about your pets being in our property daily for years.

= = = = =

you say my (87-year-old) dad told your (7-year-old) granddaughter
that you could throw your trash in our bags.
(my dad says he didn't say such a thing.
i'll discuss it in another blog.)

you say the other neighbor
throws their trash in our bag, too,
(did you see them?)
and i just let it pass.

hmmm...  i go back and forth
from my parents' place to mine
quite a number of times each day.

i do recall chancing upon their renters
throwing cigarette butts in the alley.
i did call their attention to it.

i can't recall calling them out for trash in our bag though.
i don't call out when i am not sure.

yours i'm sure about.
i see the pile on your side
then later see the same items
stuffed in our bag.
some are distinctive.
they could not just have been identical.

and if transferring them to ours is not bad enough,
you do it by transferring them to the wrong bag.
i have to do the segregation myself.

pabasurahan mo na, ipag-se-segregate mo pa!

= = = = =

you're not the only ones who go swimming in our pool.
but you're the only ones who do so on short notice.

and in case you think
saying you're going to be quick
makes things inconsequential,
it doesn't.

the effort and expense to clean the pool
for a quick dip and a longer stay
are just the same.

if it is true, as you say,
that you are going to be really quick
then why not just go
to the public pool two blocks away
and take your quick dip there?

that way, you're going to spare
my mom, and my cousin, and the cleaner
the concern of having to finish the clean-up
of that infrequently-used pool
before your arrival.

uhm, that is not likely to cross your mind, right?

oh, well...  we've adjusted to you 😒
i already told my mom
the second time it happened
to just have the pool cleaned
even without receiving a notice from you yet.

we (and you!) already know the months
you're going to go there anyway.
unlike the others who go there
simply to visit their dearly departed,
in your case, there has to be a private pool in your itinerary.

the thing is, we don't know the exact date.
having the pool cleaned too early
means it would already be leave-strewn again
by the time you arrive.

we're not going to hire another cleaner for that.
we hire a cleaner for when the water needs to be drained.
you therefore just have to make do with a pool that's not freshly-cleaned.
our apologies 🙃

= = = = =

you say
i used to say
this person was focusing too much
on this establishment
yet i am doing the same with you.

uhm, don't flatter yourself.
i try not to focus on you.
had i focused on you,
this would not have persisted for years.

but i do have a memory
(even skinner's rats
were able to recognize patterns)

so my patience eventually ran out
(you must admit,
you're off the scale).

and a big difference between me and the other person?
i do not seek out irritants.

he was complaining about
shirtless men far down the road.

he was complaining about
people looking at him.

how do you see those things
if you do not make an effort
to look out the gate
and stretch out your neck?

how do you see someone's looking at you
unless you're looking at the other person, too?

me, i complain about stuff right before my eyes.
i complain about stuff i have to clean myself.

there is no way i can not see these things.

they're right outside my gate,
on a spot within the unfenced part of our property.

they're in front of my car,
on a spot again within the unfenced part of our property.

they're right on my way.
there is no other route.

i actually have to take credit
for putting up with so much for so long.
party's over though, so shape up.

= = = = =

next time you complain about being singled out,
just remember, you're not like the rest.
you're different, and not in a good way.


when someone sets out to defend you,
you give him your full support.

you tell him "the truth,
the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth."
yes, just like making a sworn testimony.

giving him incomplete or false information
could lead him to charge on
when he actually should be retreating.
it could lead him to pry information
you've long been wanting to suppress.

the intention was to help.
the outcome is to hurt.

when the dust settles,
he'd be wounded and bruised
but the casualty really is going to be you.

track record

so there is this someone
trying to defend his friend
whom he had the gall to say
"nobody else verbally/electronically complains about."


that person has had quarrels
with every single house in the neighborhood,
from the first houses in the alley
to the last house along the main road.

not at all petty quarrels.
MAJOR ones.
it even reached the point
when she considered selling their house
because of all those animosities.
yes, that bad!
and yes, the statement came from her.
(lest this story be misinterpreted,
let me emphasize that her thought
and her uncle's aborted plan to sell the whole property
are two different things.)

her disputes actually reach far beyond the neighborhood,
including kith and kin from both sides of the family.

next time do your homework.  fact check.
don't make a fool of yourself
posting statements contrary to the truth
which so many people know about.


so someone
who obviously has no idea about the kind of response he'd get
"How does your neighbor act
"as if they have a right to your private properties"?"

uhm, i don't think the neighbor would relish her friend knowing this
but since he asked lemme reply:

- offers my credit card for use by her friendS (she did this thrice!),
even after being told never to do so

- shows her friend a pic of our pool
then tells my mom that her friend wants to take a dip there

- texts my mom to go swimming in our pool on short notice
(different instance, instances actually, from the friend's pool dip).
the pool is infrequently used
and has to be cleaned before people go swimming.
no, we do not have an in-house cleaner.
my mom has to text a cousin
who in turn has to find and hire someone to clean the pool.

-  has a penchant for crossing over to our property
instead of doing stuff on their side
then does not clean up when they're done

- lets the people she has dealings with
wait within our property
without even bothering to clean up
when these people litter the place

pa-espasyo mo na, ipaglilinis mo pa!

-  puts a bench on the unfenced part of our property,
initially just daytime,
later up to nighttime,
removing it only after i asked
whether it's already going to be a permanent fixture there

- fails to heed repeated requests
to stop the children from their household
from opening our gates,
entering our properties
and engaging in risky activities there:
playing on unsecured steel-frame clothes hangers
which they probably view as monkey bars,
chasing and racing each other through three-storey-high stairs.

- throws their garbage in our sack
saying my 87-year-old dad
told her 7-year-old granddaughter
that they could do so.
(really now?
i think i have an idea what happened here.
i'll write about it in some other blog.)
she earlier also put the blame on the maid, btw.
the thing is, it's been happening through different maids.

- has their pets spend their days within our property for yearS,
as in, seven years (!),
with pee and poop to boot

- instructs their workers
(according to the foreman himself)
to install THEIR roof
and THEIR gate
by boring holes in OUR wall.
no, we're not supposed to share common walls.
these are separate houses.
and no, they never posted a building permit
all the while that their house
was being demolished then rebuilt.

just one of these is bad enough.
they've chalked up a list.

off the scale.


so we have this neighbor
whose dogs have spent
a pretty good deal of their lives
outside their owner's property.
the dogs were spending their days for yearS
not just in public spaces
but in OUR private property.

i've been calling out the mom about it for yearS.
nicely, jokingly, sarcastically, angrily.
it persisted.

the family has been putting forward these excuses:

1.  the daughter/owner is out of the house

2.  there are children in the house who leave the gate open

3.  they cannot keep an eye on the dog,
with the mom adding her usual she has to earn money
("hindi namin matututukan 'yan, kailangan kong kumita ng pera")

these are long-term conditions, right?

when will the owner not be out of the house?
she used to not be around because she was still studying.
now she's not around because she's already working.
so when will this condition disappear?
when she gets married?  when she retires?

when will there be no children there?
there used to be just 3 children in that household.
and then there were 4.
now there's 5.
there's a 6th one soon to be born.

the youngest right now is maybe 2 years old.

when will these children grow up?

when will the mom find time for the dog?
she's a moneylender.
she has to be on her toes.
daytime her clients come to her.
nighttime she goes to them.

these people are able to recognize their circumstances
but their thought processes stop at the point
where all they could come up with
is that i should understand why the dogs are out.

why can't their thoughts cross over
to the point where they realize
that they are not capable of owning a dog?

they're so slow.
they're so irresponsible,
they're so shameless.

shifting gears

there is a method to analyzing cases.
you gather facts.
you put them in chronology.
you get the big picture.

you don't just pick
which occurrences you're going to include.
you include all relevant information.

you don't get to choose where you want to start.
you have to start at the beginning
and go on till the end.

that way you are able to identify
which are actions
and which are reactions,
which are warranted,
which are not.

you are able to determine
whether something is an isolated case
or a pattern of behavior.

the story, for example, does not start
when your dogs pee or when they poop
outside your property.
it already begins when the dogs are out of your property.

you do not skip the main offense
and jump to an aggravating circumstance.

is your dog being outside your property an isolated case?

you've had one dog spending its days
outside your property
for yearS.

when that dog died,
the same thing was the case with your second dog.

when the second dog died,
the same was the case with your third dog.

and then you got a fourth dog
and these two living pets
were again spending time outside your own property,
as was in the previous cases,
not just in public spaces
but within someone else's private property.

how long are you going to use as excuse
that the dogs have just been breaking out on accident?
it's been going on for yearS.
didn't it even occur to you
that you've actually been being negligent?

you have the nerve to say
the earlier dogs should not be counted
because they're already dead.
what sort of thought processes do you have?

does that mean when the third and fourth dogs die
you can again go on inflicting a fifth dog on others
as if it's a fresh offense
because the previous should be forgotten?

you don't disregard such things.
they make up your track record.

you've been negligent,
and shameless
for yearS.
gentle has not worked on you.
don't be surprised if i take the kid gloves off.


stories should include all relevant information.
they should be complete.
the truth should be whole.

the narrative should show
how things began,
what have transpired since
and how they ended
or are at the moment.

leaving out material parts
would paint an inaccurate picture
that could make grave situations appear light
and even make villains seem like victims.

not fair.
not right.
needs correction.