toss-coin

last night on my way to my parents' place, i was vacillating whether i should stop by the grocery store along the way to pick up a handful of items or just buy stuff the following day at the store near my place.  i ended up dropping by the store at my parents' area and what do you know, i've been inside just a short while when i hear the introvoys' 'will i survive' on the radio.  ouch!  i haven't heard that song in a looooong time and suddenly there it was unexpectedly giving me a tinge of a heartache  : }

the song is memorable because it was one of the songs a former boyfriend used to sing to me over the phone and during his visits to the house during courtship and after.  hearing it again brought back bittersweet memories of a promising relationship that was not given the chance to prosper.  suffice it to say that  timing was off then.

nevertheless, it remains one of my favorite failed relationships (ha-ha, is there such a thing?).  first, it gave me some of the sweetest memories, as in, the guy did the sweetest things.  second, it was unusual in that the relationship came to be through the toss of a coin (i like to say he won me in a coin-toss).

the guy was calling and sending letters and coming over and i was ambivalent about being his girl or not.  now, i do not believe in prolonged courtships.  i believe a suitor will not ever behave the same way as a boyfriend.  a suitor is a suitor, he's trying to win you, of course he'd be mr. patient, mr. understanding, mr. thoughtful, mr. everything-you-could-ever-hope-for.  a boyfriend already bagged you, he'd be himself, ha-ha.

with that in mind, i decided to end the agony of this suitor by telling him i was having mixed feelings about where he stood as far as my heart was concerned and i didn't want him and me to be wasting precious time so i said we'll let fate decide.  i told him we'll toss a coin and if it comes out this way he'd stop courting; if it comes out the other way i'd be his girl.  he thinks awhile then agrees on one condition -> that he be the one to toss the coin.  no problem with me.

i get a coin, he checks whether it's not one of those 'indecent proposal' coins which have the same side, then proceeds to toss.  guess what, he wins!  i was in a state of ultra-mild shock asking how he was able to do it.  he explains something about trajectory and physics and i must admit i was impressed (shallow me!) and therefore felt happily duped ; )

that relationship is a decade-and-a-half past and i am surprised that i am looking back at it now with all these positive feelings inside me.  yup, there is such a thing as getting over and moving on  : )