dumb terminal

a friend was telling me he has a simple phone.  he said he ditched the smartphone the office issued him and bought instead an ordinary one with tv.

and then he says one time he was at starbucks, he turned his tv on and other diners tried to watch / listen from it as well.  he said he covered his device (uuuhhhh, selfish!) gloating his simple phone whacked the others' smartphones, hah!

me:  'you know, the owners of those smartphones are not smart...  you have a smartphone...  you have wifi...  you should just have watched online or downloaded an app that would have allowed you to watch tv...'

not-so-smart users reduce a smart device to mediocrity...  : }

love notes

i was going through my files and was surprised (shocked?  dismayed?  wahaha...) to find envelopes containing cards i sent to and received from, uhm, exes from long ago.  #ThrowbackThursday indeed, ahaha...  ; )

i re-read them and felt so good and giddy and loving and loved...  :")

and then i wondered how come the cards i received are with me and the ones i sent are, too...  immediately i had an answer.  i request for my cards back.  uuuhhhh, baaaddd!!!  ei, it's just the cards.  everything else the guy can keep (better yet throw away, haha).

i have my reason (not sure it's valid)...  the cards i choose and the things i write are sooooo mushy...  yucky, tacky, cheesy me...  so embarrassing...  : }

oh, to be in love...  <3 <3

listen

while logging in to my e-mail, i requested my cousin beside me to dictate to me the code that she will hear on my phone.  (i have two-step verification.)

she did.

i entered it twice, both times i could not get through.

she then asked me to switch a certain digit.

i did and i was able to gain access.

she blurted out chuckling, 'active listening!  i failed!'

me:  'what's that?'

cousin:  'how well you listen...  we were being tested monthly...'
(she used to work at a call center.)

me:  'oh...  so there is such a test?'

cousin:  'yes...  you have to listen very well otherwise you won't pass...'

hmmm...  if only we had that in daily life...

more than meets the eye

niece brought cookies to my parents' place...  she says they made it...

me:  'you were the one who baked it?'

niece:  'us classmates...'

me:  'i'll take a picture...'

niece:  'don't!  it doesn't look good...'

me:  'it's okay...  what's important is that it was made by you...'

:")

an arm and a leg

bumped into my cousin at the supermarket...  i had the big packs:  a dozen toilet paper, 300 cotton balls, 400 cotton buds...

cousin:  'what's that for?'

me:  'my supply...'

cousin:  'why that much?'

me:  'cheaper in bulk...'

cousin:  'but they'll get dated...'

me:  'you use these everyday...  for food i want fresh...  these are for external use...'

cousin:  'so you really buy your supplies?'

me:  'of course...  what would i use if i don't?'

cousin:  'but <uncle -> my dad> buys so much...'

(uhm, my dad goes grocery-shopping as if he's stocking up a warehouse...)

me:  'so?'

cousin:  'i thought you just get there...'

me:  'that's too much...  i already eat there [daily  ->  i don't cook]...  don't tell me i'm gonna bring their groceries to my house as well...'

i don't abuse kindness...  \m/

proud mommas

my nephews' prom...  i was taking pics of them and their friends before they left my cousin's house...  four handsome young men  ->  and two moms kept on joining the pic!

me to the moms (my sister-in-law and my cousin):  'hey, you two mothers...  after this shot, disappear...  you've had your prom...  it's the teens' turn now...'

; p

start at the very beginning

my mom wasn't around so my dad heard mass by himself...

me:  'you attended the 10 a.m. mass?'

dad:  '10:00?  i thought it was 10:30...'

me:  'oh...  so you were late...'

dad:  'no...'

me:  'you were there 10:30?'

dad:  'i arrived during the sermon...'

me:  'oh...  you were late alright...'

dad:  'but the sermon has just started...'

uhm...  the mass does not start with the sermon, dad...  ; )

peace...  <3

not applicable

at a hand-pulled noodle shop...  noodles sooo long...

friend:  'how do you cut these?'

me:  'oh...  you're not supposed to cut them...  the chinese don't...'

friend:  'are you chinese?'

me:  'no...'

friend:  'neither am i...  so it's okay to cut...'

: }

how smart

i have two phones...  i inserted the cable on the one i wanted to charge...  an hour later i find that it's the cable of the other i plugged in the electric outlet...

it happens to the best of us...  nyahaha...  bull!!!  ; p

choose your battles

niece goes to my parents' place looking for my dad's uniforms...

mom: 'what for?'

niece: 'we have noli (me tangere)... i'm alperes...'

me: 'what's alperes?'

niece: 'leader of the guardia civil... they were getting me as ibarra but i declined...'

me: 'oh, ibarra's lead... why didn't you accept?'

niece: 'he has too many lines, tita...'

hehe... ok... ; )

close-open

going out with something on my hands...

me:  'is the door open?'

sister:  'it's closed...'

me:  'it's closed???'

sister:  'yes...'

me:  'are you sure?'

sister:  'yes...'

me:  'but i opened it...'

sister:  'oh...  i closed it...'

aw...  she is sure alright...  : }

buy low, sell high

my mom calls her broker to sell some stocks...

broker dissuades her saying there's going to be a dividend tomorrow...

me:  'oh...  so now's a good time to sell as the price will drop dramatically tomorrow...'

mom:  'but i won't be entitled to the dividend if i sell now...'

hmmm...  i wonder how the numbers will work out...  i would have sold and then just bought again low...

because it's there

sister comes out of the room eating chocs...

me:  'wow...  chocs...'

sister:  'there's a lot in the ref...  you haven't been getting...  don't you like?'

me:  'my [new year] resolution's to cut down on chocs...  unless you actually hand me one...'

she did...  and i ate...

; )

futile

on the phone with a friend...  she wasn't able to rotate certain pics she uploaded in facebook...

me:  'next time rotate the pic...  the iced teas are sideways...  they might spill...'

friend:  'what?  what?  i can't hear you...'

joke.  fell.  flat.  toinks.

; p

memorable not

sister:  'my officemates bought this cake...  'twas so thin...'

me:  'thin?'

sister:  'yes...  just like this <she measures around an inch with her hand>...'

me, bringing up a picture from my drive:  'is this the one?'

sister:  'oh, yes...  that...  is that good?'

me:  'you've had that before!  you even have a pic...  you don't remember so probably you didn't find it delicious...'

some things are forgettable...  ; p

going the distance

sister calling me because someone i've said i like is on tv...

i was doing something so i just said ok...

sister calls me several times again saying the guy's number might end...

i still don't go downstairs...

mom:  'stop calling her...  if she doesn't go down, then that means she's not that interested...'

ahahaha...  yup...

excuses are for people who don't want it bad enough...  \m/

not quite the same

'catch frozen today' in the newspaper cinema page...

me:  'wow, i like this!  i missed it last time...  where is it showing?'

i go over the movie line-up...  i can't find it...

sister:  'lemme...'

me:  'i've checked, none...'

sister:  'i will...'

she gets the newspaper from me and goes over the line-up herself...

sister:  ''winter's tale'...  is the title really 'frozen' not 'winter's tale'?'

; )

what counts

sister sending food to my brother's house...

sister:  'is this enough?'

me:  'depends on how many they are...'

sister:  'how many are they?'

me:  'i'm not sure...  who's there now?'

sister:  'dunno...  <sister adds more food>...  you think this is enough?'

me:  'it really depends on how many they are...  wait, no...  it depends on how many like that...'

sister looks at the food and scoops OUT some from the plate...

hehe...  presence does not always equate to preference...

form over substance

i was buying cake yesterday and while the cashier was processing my payment, this young man beside me placed an order for one of the mini-cakes.

i cringed a bit when i heard his choice.  i've tried almost all the cakes there (the big versions, not just the mini) and what he ordered was far from their best.  it was ok but nothing special, at least to me.  (i've tried countless cakes.  i'm the family's cake girl.  i'm the one who buys our cakes, occasion or no-occasion.)

i tried to keep quiet but could not.  it was valentine's day.  i think he was going to give it to someone special.

i asked the guy:  'have you tried that cake before?'

the guy smiled:  'no...  first time...'

me:  'uhm...  i've tried almost all their cakes...  that one's just okay...  so is their <other cake>...  their <cake 1> is really good though...  and my sister-in-law and my niece both liked <cake 2> very much...'

the guy checked out the display...  then with an uneasy laugh he told me, 'i guess that'll do for now...  i'm after the dedication (Happy Valentine's Day)...  i'll just save the delish ones for birthdays...'

oh...  hehe...  ok...

maybe he's right...  for valentine's day, you don't really savor the cake, you savor the love...  <3 <3

you don't get what you don't deserve

i went someplace and parking was full...  supposedly, you drive around in sequence of arrival...  but then this vehicle behind me decided to overtake me...  eh?!

guess what, just as he drove past, this car parked in a slot between us backed up!  it was leaving!!!  i got the slot!!!  goody-goody-goody-good!!!  : D

uhm...  that should have been yours, guy...  but you didn't play fair  ->  and it backfired...  hah!

our time

i received a message from someone telling me that she was going to drop by the house as she was going to ask me something.

ok.  i sent her a message asking what time she'll arrive.

no reply.

i was supposed to go out but i held out as i didn't want her to be coming over only to find out i wasn't around.  i also didn't want to be telling her to drop by some other day instead as i'm not really sure how her schedule is.

i was supposed to go out at 10:30 a.m.  i did not because of her text.  2:00 p.m. she still wasn't around.  : }

i decided to make a quick dash to where i was supposed to go.  out i went...  did the urgent thing on my to-dos (skipped the rest)...  rushed back home...

i was still changing back into house clothes when i heard someone calling out my name...  whoa!  it was her!  i arrived just in time!!!  whew!

she was all smiles and everything.  me, i was visibly pissed off.  i told her not to send me short-notice, open-ended messages like that next time.

i don't like it when people are vague about MY time...  do as you want with yours but please be considerate enough not to act as if you own mine.

chocolate frame

a couple of years ago, an italy-based former officemate handed me a gift-wrapped package saying, 'because i know you love chocolate...'

when i opened it at home, i was sooo happy to see that it was a chocolate frame...  i love chocs and i love pics so i thought it was a really great combination...  : )

since i haven't yet decided on a good pic to put on the frame, i wrapped it again and put it on a chair (haha, yup, not table) in my living room together with my bags...

well, just recently someone gave me a hershey's chocolate world shirt and i thought maybe i should have a picture wearing that and then that's what i'd put in the frame...  then i remembered i also received this other shirt sometime back that says, 'Give me chocolate and nobody gets hurt!!'  hmmm...  which of the two would look better on the frame?

i unwrapped the frame and guess what, was i horrified to see melting chocolate!!!  wuuutttt???!!!  all the while i thought it was a picture frame designed to look like chocolate!!!  ' turns out it's chocolate molded to look like a picture frame!  i did not notice!!!  (good thing the ants did not, too...)

and it just occurred to me that the other times the giver has flown over, she has been giving me chocs...  it's more likely therefore that she'd get me something from a chocolate shop than from a picture store...  why did i not think of that?!  how could i let such chocolate expire?!  uuuhhhh!!!

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10152190088338544.1073741845.542313543&type=1&l=a74b04c05e

a child's mind

my three-year-old granddaughter playing on the rooftop...  she sees a house and tells her playmate:  'wow...  a yellow house!  it's so nice!  c'mon, let's live there...'

they make it sound so easy...  ; )

background, please

nephew went on a field trip...

me:  'where did <nephew> go?'

niece:  'i dunno...'

me:  'they have pics in facebook but i can't figure out the place...'

mom:  'he posted pics?'

me:  'his classmate tagged him...  so many pics but all i can see are their faces...  i have no idea where they went...  that's what i've been saying, you go someplace, at least include the place in the pic...  if you're just going to take pics of your face, you might as well just take pics of your eyes, your nose, your mouth, at home...'

: }

not now

called my bank to allow a $43.99 plus i dunno how much for taxes online transaction to push through...  i said, 'forty-three ninety-nine dollars...'

phone banker:  'that's four thousand...'

me:  'ooops, no!  just 43 dollars and 99 cents...  plus taxes i dunno how much...  maybe around $50 total...'

what on earth will i buy overseas worth 4,000 dollars?!  when i win the lottery, we'll see...  but first  i'll have to start buying tickets...  ; )

identity crisis

leaving a parking lot this afternoon, i asked a parking attendant sitting nearby:  'where's the other parking attendant?'

parking attendant 2:  'i'm the parking attendant...'

me:  'no...  the one i talked to earlier...'

parking attendant 2:  'i'm the one...'

me:  'you were the one i was talking to???'

parking attendant 2:  'yes...'

me:  'we talked?!'

parking attendant 2:  'yes...'

me:  'the guy looked different...'

parking attendant 2:  'it's me...'

me:  'really???'

parking attendant 2:  'yes!'

hmmm...  my car has been parked less than an hour...  is my memory that bad that i could not recall his face at all?  people's faces don't normally change that much in such a short time...  anyway, i was ready to hand him my tip when suddenly the attendant i was looking for showed up...

parking attendant 2:  'oh, he's here...  that's him...'

me:  'yes, it's him!  how come you were telling me it's you?  i knew he looked different...'

i handed the first attendant my tip and then went someplace else and again parked there...  a lady with a baby on her hips said she'll look after my car...

ok...

15 minutes later i was back...

me to a guy directing some cars:  'where's the woman with a baby?'

guy:  'my mother?'

me:  'she's your mom?'

guy:  'yes...'

hmmm...  he looked old enough to be her husband...

me:  'where is she?'

guy:  'my mother just left awhile...'

oh?  ok...  i just handed the tip to the 'son'...

whatever...

overreacting

trying to download something on my phone...

"Failed to receive today's emoticons due to weak connection."

eh?!  i'm just six inches away from the modem and router!

A.  move far
B.  wire phone
C.  change phone
D.  change ISP
E.  retry later

me, E...

had it been this someone i know though, C...

frugal vs. extravagant...  ; )

missing link

niece:  'we don't have classes, tita...'

me:  'why?'

niece:  'there's construction...'

me:  'what construction?'

niece:  'they're building a faculty development something...'

me:  'that's the reason you don't have classes???'

niece:  'yes...  wait, tita, i'm just going to get my allowance from lolo...'

eh?!

the verdict

eating a certain donut sandwich...  i could not quite figure out whether it's good or not...  it did look quite delish in pics...

i subjected it to a test:  'will i order this again?'

the answer was 'no.'

i told my sister, 'whiskey pete's...'

(yup, the casino in nevada...
that's our way of saying something is not our type...

from the street language
wiz = no, none
ki = ko = me, mine

plus our own
pete ~ type)

my sister went:  'me, too...  whiskey pete's...'

settled...  \m/

operant conditioning

my three-year-old granddaughter leaving my parents' place:  'we should close their gate otherwise they won't give us gifts anymore...'

hahahahaha...  i wonder where she learned that...  my mom?  her mom?  skinner?

; )