crossroads

last night when i posted, i told myself i better blog again tomorrow so my blog will go beyond 13 entries -> ok, ok, silly thought there you might say : }

anyway, i had thought of blogging about my broken headlight but i'm going to set that aside to give way to something more personal.

i am at a crossroads at this point. something that i had believed to be easily obtainable all these years turns out to be hard to get. i learned just yesterday that certain requirements i do not meet.

i've been thinking, if i were to spend so much time, money and effort to dissolve something that was supposed to last forever; should i just not instead spend time and effort (no expense on this one) rebuilding what has been broken? hopes will be dashed either way -> which should carry more weight?

someone who used to be so dear to me liked to say, "there are signs for men of understanding." i don't really know whether i am a woman of understanding but right now the signs appear really conflicting to me. i am looking forward to a clincher. in the meantime, i am spending a lot of time in prayer and introspection... i hope i get my epiphany soon...